i dont kno where to begin.
something i wish you could understand, but its ok because thats not important anymore.
tho, id like to thank you. for the millions upon millions of lessons ive learned either from you, with you, or of you. thank you so, so very much.
i do hate all of the world for rolling over their evil shadows on me and everyone else.....but its all ok now, they still dont get it, and i do. :]
part of getting my muchness back, is accepting that i am who i am and that its OKAY if im not up to par with anyones opinion or with the rest of the world. my muchness, is perfectly based on being me, as always shouldve been! not according to "you" or "anyone". and if im trying to change for anything or anyone other than myself...thats defeating the entire point, is it not? thats not getting my muchness back at all. muchness has nothing to do with anybody or anything other than myself. simply.
and so here i am, having all my muchness i can possibly hold in this little body. its been here, all along. i didnt have to get it back...i just needed to realize where id hidden it.
boy, does it feel fucking fabulous to have been found!
oh how i love my muchness...
its beautiful. its amazing. its me.
(i cant wait to buy 'alice in wonderland' when it comes out...)
the world has never seemed so alright.
the future, never seemed so bright.
nor have i looked at things in this way in so long...
gahd im so pleased right now. so pleased. with myself. with everything.
aaaannddd...i dont want to get hung up on this, because thats exactly where ive always gone wrong. but...im excited. very, very excited! about this.
i wish i had had some down time. but who gives a flying fuck about all the befores if this is where i end up?
(you kno who you are. goddamn you, why are you doing this to me? tehehe. FUCK!)
im going to go make a cd now. ill be sure to add manson, brand new, my chemical romance, afi, the used, ten years, and plenty plenty of incubus...its going to be a great weekend. :]
yeeeeaaa...remix baby!
6:38 pm - 05.20.10
Recent entries:
07.06.16//there's one broken cobblestone still clinging to the bridge
06.30.16//digression of glitter, shiny, and sparkle!
06.27.16//half a life ago
12.15.11//sometimes, you've got to love what's good for you.
09.26.11//you are my beginning to my never-end
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