i have concluded that i will never have actually truly good friends from now on.
nobody will be as good as the ppl i spent my entire childhood with.
cuz right now, EVERYBODY else FUCKING SUCKS compared to them...
EVERYBODY.
what i wouldnt do to be sitting in penguin's class getting annoyed at ppl saying dumb things and talkin about ridin dirty...
needless to say, last nite cayce completely avoided all of my phone calls. not something new, and i wasnt surprised.
and then also last nite,
i got this message from amy.
From: chasing amy.....?
Date: Nov 26, 2008 8:42 PM
i don't know what's going on with you. can't figure it out for the life of me.
that shit with the undercover was somewhat unnerving, but then you throw in that random little, "but i'm not sleeping with allen." thing.
it would have been overlooked, honestly, were it not for that text you sent brandi about him. why would you ask her? why not ask me??
but you know what? it's none of my business. he isn't mine anymore, you deserve the chance to cheat on philip, and allen deserves the chance to get philip back. i just hope you know what you're doing.
the consequences just may be somewhat greater than you might expect. just a little heads up. you know, as a friend.
and i sent her back this, obviously very very confused:
From: inhibitor M;;
Date: Nov 26, 2008 11:32 PM
are you freaking out on me cuz i texted the person i knew youd be with at the time a question about ur x?
i dont want to be with allen,
i dont kno where you got that text from or if i ever said those words, and if i did i didnt mean the way you took them AT ALL, EVERR
and im definitely not trying to cheat on phillip with him. so...yet again, im really confused!
and then just a while ago, i get on and i have received this:
From: chasing amy.....?
Date: Nov 27, 2008 10:51 AM
you knew i'd be with her at the time? well i wasn't. i was with "my x". we were shopping for toys for our son.
so why not text me? why text the person you THOUGHT i would be with rather than my phone that you KNEW would be on me? it's whatever meredith. really.
however, if this is one of your crimestopper stunts so you can use the police for money so YOU can get high, you won't get too far. allen doesn't smoke weed anymore. he doesn't pop pills or stick shit up his nose. so it's a dead end. get your fix money elsewhere.
just the thought that you would take my son's father from him just to get high makes me sick.
i've no need for a friend like that.
so i was like, WTF? i dont kno where all of this came from. so:
From: inhibitor m;;
Date: Nov 27, 2008 5:01 PM
OK SERIOUSLY WHAT THE FUCK! I DIDNT EVEN FUCKING DO ANYTHING!!!!
WHY THE FUCK ARE YOU FREAKING OUT ON ME FOR NO REASON AT ALL!??!?!?!
ALL I DID WAS ASK A GODDAMN SIMPLE QUESTION!!!!
MY BAD FOR FUCKING TEXTING THE WRONG CELL PHONE!
BUT THE ONLY REASON I ASKED IF HE SMOKED POT ANYMORE IS CUZ PHILLIP WANTED TO FUCKING GET HIM A SWEET FOR THE BABY SHOWER!
FUCK YOU AMY FOR ASSUMING ALL THIS SHIT
I DONT KNO WHY YOU'RE DOING THIS
FUCK YOU!
OBVIOUSLY I DONT KNO YOU LIKE I THOUGHT I DID, COMING OUT OF FUCKING NOWHERE WITH ALL THIS SHIT I DONT EVEN KNO WHAT ITS ABOUT CUZ EVERYTHING IS CONCOCTED IN YOUR FUCKING HEAD!!
IVE NEVER CALLED CRIMESTOPPERS IN MY LIFE, EVER!
IVE NEVER BEEN A RAT OR A SNITCH, I DONT GIVE A FLYING FUCK ABOUT OTHER PPLS BUSINESS AND WHAT THEY DO!
WHY THE HELL WOULD I WANT TO GET ALLEN IN TROUBLE FOR ANY FUCKING REASON?! I DONT EVEN KNO HIM!! YOU ARE MY FRIEND, HE IS YOUR BABYS DADDY, WHY WOULD I DO THAT TO YOU?
I DONT GIVE A FLYING FUCK ABOUT HIM! AT ALL!!
why would u think i was doing any of that??? why???
and not about you anymore either. this was way out of line in so many ways and you had NO right to do or say any of this to me.
i needed you as a friend, i dont kno why you fucking did this...
but get ur fucking facts and ur head straight cuz ure wrong and u just lost a good friend.
or atleast thats what i was TRYING to be. APPARENTLY ppl dont want those anymore!
fuck...
5:45 am - 11.26.08
Recent entries:
07.06.16//there's one broken cobblestone still clinging to the bridge
06.30.16//digression of glitter, shiny, and sparkle!
06.27.16//half a life ago
12.15.11//sometimes, you've got to love what's good for you.
09.26.11//you are my beginning to my never-end
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